Canadian Medical Procedures Seem More Fun Than Ours
By mister jason • Jan 9th, 2006 • Category: Random Oddities
File under: Don’t try this at home.
(It should be noted that the individual performing the procedure is a Doctor.)
Off-label use of a recreational device (the Super Soaker Max-D 5000)
The patient had been swimming multiple times a day for 6 days. He had had several ear infections as a child but was otherwise well. He admitted having used a Q-tip in his ear “once or twice” recently in the affected ear.An otoscope being available, examination of the external ears was conducted. The nature of his problem was revealed as bilaterally impacted cement-like ear cerumen.
Neither a formal ear syringe, nor a syringe of any kind was available on the island. The day was very hot, and no one was particularly in the mood to boat to Honey Harbour and then drive 45 minutes to Midland, just on account of ear wax. One of the owners of the property was consulted in his capacity as a professional engineer and the owner of a superbly stocked tool shed (rivalling a mid-sized Canadian Tire). He was not able to offer any substitute contraption of his own but suggested we approach his 4-year-old grandson to see if we could use his pressured water cannon.
Yeah, that’s right. The Super Soaker Max-D 5000. awww yeah.
mister jason is a post-hardcore rock'n'roller, graphic designer, amateur chef, typography nerd, coffee connoisseur, radio guy, motorcyclist, skateboard commuter, and a reluctant adult. He lives in Portland's Old Town area with the lovely Dr. Adrienne and Rocco the Dog.
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Hm. All well and good, but I fear the untrained will try to replicate this procedure with disastrous results.
So please. Unless you are medically trained, DO NOT train a Super-Soaker at your own or anyone else’s eardrum.
And for Christ’s sake, KEEP THE Q-TIPS OUTTA THERE AS WELL.
Are you listening? Damn it, you have a Q-tip in there right now, don’t you?